Good Advice

This is another Today's Gift e-mail that I had to share with you today.

Today's thought from Hazelden (Todaysgift@Hazelden.info) is:

Who knows better how to push our buttons than family members? Who, besides family members, do we give such power? Relationships with family members can be provocative. One telephone conversation can put us in an emotional and psychological tailspin that lasts for hours or days.

The process of detaching in love from family members can take years. So can the process of learning how to react in a more effective way. We cannot control what they do or try to do, but we can gain some sense of control over how we choose to react.

Stop trying to make them act or treat us any differently. Unhook from their system by refusing to try to change or influence them. Their patterns, particularly their patterns with us, are their issues. How we react, or allow these patterns to influence us, is our issue.. How we take care of ourselves is our issue.

We can take care of ourselves with family members without feeling guilty. We can learn to be assertive with family members without being aggressive. We can set the boundaries we need and want to set with family members without being disloyal to the family.

We can learn to love our family without forfeiting love and respect for ourselves.

Today, help me start practicing self-care with family members. Help me know that I do not have to allow their issues to control my life, my day, or my feelings. Help me know its okay to have all my feelings about family members, without guilt or shame.


This is excellent advice that I am going to try to take. I have the tendency to want to take care of everyone around me and fix everyone's problems. I need to let go of that, take care of myself, and not feel guilty about it. I am going to try to do this in an attempt to de-stress my life and to make things easier on myself. Do you take on too much? Do you need to practice self-care with family members?

Have a good day and be inspired!