A Worthy Investment

Today, I was reading the daily e-mails that I have signed up to receive. The Daily Generous Wife tip was one that made me really sit back and think.

I'm going to share another hubby tip. This concept is so important. Our culture teaches us to let things slide and look for the easy route. A good marriage can take real work, but it's one of the best investments you'll every make.

I had cause recently to go mucking about in my spam folder - all the stuff I never see because software dumps it for me. As I ran through it looking for one e-mail, I found an interesting common thread in much of what was there ... I saw get a degree without any studying, lose weight without exercise or diet, and even "make money in sleep". In other words, a lot of spam is offering to give us something for nothing - or at least something without doing any real work for it.

If this is a hallmark of our culture, then do we look for the same thing in our marriages? Do we want the easy fix, the no work solution, or maybe the "throw money at it to fix it" method? The reality is a good marriage takes work, and a great marriage takes a lot of work. And not just work, but ongoing work - without maintenance you lose ground, and growth always takes additional effort.

I can assure you that the rewards of the effort can be great. The joy of a good marriage is deep and profound. Don't let the something for nothing attitude that is so common today rob you of what you could have.

This is so true and such good advice. Recently, a dear friend of mine has been struggling with her marriage. She has been married for 10 years and has 2 small children (her youngest is getting ready to turn one year old). I was so relieved, happy, and inspired when I spoke to her last week and she said that they decided they did not want to loose each other and that they were going to work hard to make their marriage better and to make time for each other. My friend was telling me that it is so easy to get wrapped up into the day-to-day minutia and to neglect your spouse and their needs. I totally understand what she means and I have only been married for nearly 2 years!

I always knew that marriage was going to be hard work and I was and am prepared to give it everything I have and then some. It is scary to think - "I could be in that spot in 7 years or 10 years or 20 years and how will we get through it? Will we ever feel like we are really close to saying the dreaded D word or needing a separation?" It just really scares me to think of the rocky times that are inevitable in any marriage. In today's world, divorce is so common. Unfortunately, it is less common to hear stories like my dear friend who is working on saving her marriage and is determined to do so. I am so inspired by my friend and her husband!

Jason and I are guilty of getting wrapped up in the small stuff. We are guilty of making the items on our to-do list top priority. We are guilty of filling up the monthly calendar with lots of "things to do" and having few of those so called important "things" being date nights. Luckily, we realize it and are making changes to have more time together. I am excited to plan a real vacation with my husband in January to get away from it all - kind of like a second honeymoon!

A happy and healthy marriage is one that always requires work...lots of laughter, sweat, and tears. Your initial investment, the day you start your marriage, can dwindle and loose value if you do not constantly reevaluate and add to its worth.

Love is strong yet delicate.
It can be broken.
To truly love is to understand this.
To be in love is to respect this.
- Stephen Packer -

Be Inspired!