There Are No Winners

I read something last week that really struck a cord with me.  It really hit me like a ton of bricks.  Nicole Yontz wrote THIS article about her recent experience with miscarrying her baby.  What she wrote at the end of her article is what struck me the most.

"Friends have come out of the woodwork telling me their stories. Heartbreaking stories. And if there were a contest for who has the worst dead fetus story, I would not win by a long shot. But this isn't a contest. There are no winners."

That is so true for me, too.  I can't TELL you the number of people who have been so kind as to share their stories with me...their stories of miscarriage, losing a child, postpartum illness.  Each story tells of a cross that someone has had to bear and each story is one of strength and courage.  I hear at least a new story or two a week.  I feel so honored that people feel compelled to share their personal struggles and triumphs with me.  And Nicole is right...it isn't a contest of who has the worst story because I know that I don't.  I know that I am truly blessed.  I know that even though what I went through was difficult, there are people out there that don't get better.  There are people out there that want a child so badly and cannot have one.  There are women out there that lost the battle with the postpartum psychosis monster.  There are truly no winners.

What I do know is that I want to keep the dialogue going.  I want people to continue to talk about these things because they are REAL and because people need to be able to share their own stories and struggles.  It could help someone going through something similar.   When I was dealing with my miscarriage, I joined a support group online and I read many blogs from other mother's who had lost children either through miscarriage or tragically after birth.  It helped me tremendously.  I felt like someone out there understood.  Someone out there "got it."  Since I have been recovering from the postpartum psychosis and depression, I have reached out to many mothers and even husbands of women who have suffered from the same illnesses.  It helps me to feel like I am not alone.  It TRULY helps more than words can express.  I might even go as far as to say that one man who lost his wife to postpartum psychosis seriously was a part in saving my life.  This man is such an inspiration and I am truly grateful that the Internet brought us together.  His wife was amazing and beautiful and a GOOD mom.  She was absolutely a Warrior Mom.

So...all this to say..keep talking people.  Keep sharing your stories.  Don't be silent. It WILL help others and it could save someone's life.